A Guide to Wedding Rituals and Customs

 From the old adage, ‘Something borrowed, something blue’, to the exchange of wedding rings, rituals and customs have always been a highly important part of weddings, globally. Each custom and ritual has its own history and symbolism.

Often, we employ these rituals and customs, without giving much thought, to why they exist, and how they benefit us.

So, this new weekly series of blogs from Lily Blossom Florists, will help you to understand the history and symbolism of each wedding ritual and custom; and help you to think about how you can, and why you should, personalize each one, to make your wedding day a unique, meaningful experience.

What is a Ritual?

A ritual is a performed series of actions including words, gestures and objects.

Weddings are a rite of passage, and as such, contain many rituals and customs, such as, walking down the aisle, getting married under an arch, having a flower girl and page boy walk before the bride and groom, the exchange of wedding rings, wearing a bridal gown, and the wedding breakfast.

But why do we perform these rituals?

The Psychological Benefit of Ritual

Isn’t it funny: we goal-set for our career, employ visualization techniques, and give preparation to events such as interviews. We define the terms of ‘success’, in board meetings, with measurable outcomes and targets, so that we know exactly what ‘success’ means to our team, and can recognise it when we attain it. But we don’t do this, when entering into a potentially life-long marriage!

The more we prepare for a goal, the more committed we are to the process, the more we are able to influence the outcome. Recent studies, show that when rituals are performed with specific outcomes in mind, the result is much more likely to be favourable.

So often, we enter into marriage with a wooly, unclear idea of what we hope and expect. However, there is a new (or some would argue-  resurgent ) school of thought, to suggest that the more explicit we are, with our partner, about what exactly we want and expect from a marriage, the more likely a successful marriage becomes.

How to Use Rituals on Your Wedding Day

Complementary with Lily Blossom's Forever Wedding Package

Your wedding is a day-long ritual. We would go further to suggest that, the more preparation, thought, detail, and emotional significance that you attach to the aesthetics of your wedding, the clearer you will be about what you are signing up to.

For instance: choosing your wedding colours because they are ‘nice’ or fashionable, is well and good. But choosing purple, because of its spiritual or cultural significance, or blue, because it represents water, and therefore, the importance of emotions, is by far a more informed, conscious choice.

Choosing white roses to represent the peace and tranquility that you desire for your new home, while you strive in the outside world for success, and making sure that you openly declare the significance of the white rose, is a more sensible strategy, than simply choosing white roses ‘because you like them’.

By personalizing and engaging in ritual, we are committing on both a conscious, and more importantly, subconscious level. It is the thought we give to the details of our wedding, and the symbolic significance that we consciously attribute to those aesthetic details, that are important.

Choosing colours for particular reasons, is like visualizing what you want for your married life. By selecting these things together, you are in fact, stating your subconscious (or conscious) wishes and desires, and actively visualising them.

By far the easiest, most beautiful, and most popular way to make visible your goals for married life, is with flowers. After all, they have their own language!

How to Choose a Wedding Florist

Your partner and yourself are getting married because you love each other, you want to achieve things together, and because together, you are stronger.

Before choosing a florist, or employing any other type of wedding planning service, think together, about what it is you want to achieve. Would you like children? Is romance important to you? Do you insist on honesty? Is emotional strength a non-negotiable? Do you both long for that quaint little house by the sea? Is it important to you both, that you bring your own culture and customs to your union and future family?

Once you have discussed this, and have a clearer idea (which by no means has to be finite), our guide can help you to understand which flowers, colours, wedding rituals and customs can best represent your shared goals.

With the average spend on wedding flowers reaching £450, it is of course vital you give thought to who you choose as your wedding florist. They must be, what we like to call, ‘The Three P’s’:

Personable, Passionate and Professional.

In order to be able to create floral decorations that represent your highly personal desires for your new life, your wedding florist will have to be trustworthy and non-judgmental; you have to feel that you can talk openly with them, that they will take your desires seriously, and translate your perhaps initially unclear desires, into more concrete, visually stunning floral creations.

If you don’t feel your florist is taking your desires seriously, walk away. Knowledgeable florists will be able to combine what is fashionable, with what is meaningful. Wedding floristry is very different from other types of floristry. Your wedding day will be one of the most meaningful days of your life, if the right attention to detail is applied.

Put Your Best Foot Forward!

Psychologists and social scientists are finding that rituals may well make for better emotional adjustment to a new situation. In other words, creating and engaging in highly personal rituals on your wedding day, allows you to demonstrate your commitment to your shared goals, and go into your marriage with your best foot forward.

Professional wedding florists, Lily Blossom, have an excellent wedding flowers deal, which will see you receiving a free bouquet of fresh flowers, every year, on your anniversary, for twelve years. The exclusive package was featured in popular men's online wedding magazine The Groom List, in 2013, and has been riotously popular since then! It makes a beautiful engagement gift. 

The package effectively means that, if you spend a minimum of £400 on your wedding flowers (including buttonholes, table centrepieces and the important bouquet), you will have got your wedding flowers, for free, with a whole host of other benefits. In this financially difficult time, it is an extremely good deal.  

Give Lily Blossom a call on 0208 979 5656, or email them, and ask about their ‘Forever Wedding’ package, for full details.

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